Isolation

Tonight I went to a prayer meeting at my church. I've been to several, and usually go with the intent of asking them to pray for me, but never summoning the courage to actually ask for the prayer. So each week I leave feeling crappy. But tonight I decided to share my heart and ask the 20 adults [most of which are older than me by 30 and 40 years] to pray for me.

And it sucked.

And it was so good.

Every time my dear friend Alicia rubs my back I say "that hurts!" and she asks if it's a good hurt or a bad hurt. This prayer time was a good hurt.

It required being vulnerable, and telling people I hardly know (though deeply trust) that I am actually weak and not as put together as I come across. I shared with them the difficulty I am having in my walk with the Lord and the ways that I am struggling. And for 15 minutes they prayed for me and read scripture to me and cried with me. And it was so good.

Here are a few things I walked away with:

-The importance of speaking out loud...reading the Bible aloud, talking about where I am at with people (instead of the isolation I have been choosing), etc.

-Ephesians 6...claiming this each day.

And several other things I'm not willing to post on the internet. But I feel the Lord stirring in my heart and healing me and changing me. I will share more as I find it important!

I'm off to watch a good movie with a good friend while drinking good water.