Gracias a Dios

[field trip to the museum

an hour long rest time

something fun in the mail today

my new water bottle

tim finn

awanas tonight

my new bike helmet

walk to the park with zeke and hartlee today

babysitting job tomorrow]

ssenlufknaht

today i am thankful for:

a babysitting job
water
joelle
a good book
alicia
my bed
rei
starbucks at rei
my new bike helmet i bought at rei
the river by starbucks at rei and the sunshine today

i am thankful for:

my meeting tonight and the way it centers me
hartlee's kisses in target
petroleum jelly
a new supporter!
talking to emily bastine on the phone
yummy chicken for dinner
clean laundry
spending the whole day with zeke and hartlee
10 new letters to send out for support!
erin comes home tomorrow
my meeting tonight and the way it centers me

bleh.

Life has been a little bleh lately. And it's raining today, which amplifies it. Not just a quick shower, which is typical to Colorado, but more like a downpour that will last all day. Kind of feels like my heart today.

There is just so much in life right now that needs to be figured out. I am at a weird transition but not really stage of life. I am in transition, but I will be for a year. And adjusting to life right now has taken longer than I expected and has been harder than I expected. How do I be me when nothing around me is me? None of my friends are around; I'm sleeping on someone else's bed in someone else's room in someone else's house.

Part of me just feels despair when I think about it being this was for a year. And then I start to wonder if life will even get better when I move to Missouri because none of my friends will be there either. Which, I am good at making friends and that doesn't scare me, but what does scare me is the idea of going somewhere that I am not known at all. It just sounds a bit lonely, which is the overwhelming emotion in this stage of life, so the prospect of Missouri is just not that exciting to me.

But it is. That's what's hard. The logical part of me wants to just move back to Greeley, or Fort Collins, and find a job and be with my friends. But a bigger part of me (probably the part of me that actually walks with the Lord) is so excited to go to Missouri....excited to meet new people, to get to be on campus reaching lost students with the Gospel, to start a new life, to experience a deeper level of healing that will come with being 700 miles from home.

I'm just rambling at this point, but I think the moral of all of this is that life is not all good or all bad. Life right now is not all bad, and as long as I keep reminding myself of that I will make it. And, Missouri is not all good OR all bad, and as long as I keep reminding myself of that I will make it there. Perhaps it would be wise to restart my thankfulness posts everyday. Being thankful sure does make a difference in my heart and perspective on life.

With that said, today I am thankful for....

fresh flowers next to my bed

no rent

zeke and hartlee

erin and chris

good music from meehee

bustakappa and seeing them last night

tears

rain!!!

getting to spend the afternoon with zeke and hartlee

michigan in 25 days!!!!!

the process, i suppose, because i have to be thankful for it

money to deposit in the bank today

funny dreams last night

my sweet friends from new staff training

thankful

[missouri state university

ginger ale

a shower

getting to sleep in a bit

seeing kelly & bruce henderson

hugs from meehee

"free" food in the dorm

a relaxing day yesterday

vision for ministry partner development

erin is coming up today

emily bastine

going to lafayette with emily bastine]

Today is Monday. I am thankful this Monday because I am here, in Fort Collins, with 9,000 other Campus Crusade for Christ staff members. I am going to go eat breakfast now. :)

joyeria

Joyeria is the Spanish word for jewelry store. But when I lived in Mexico I always thought it should be a joy shop - maybe there is an implication that jewels will bring you joy, but probably not. Anyway, if I could sell all the things that give me joy right now in a store, this is what it would have:

-a barbecue with my friends on memorial day
-waking up to Hartlee and Zeke giving me hugs and love
-spending a morning cleaning, organizing and packing
-lunch with fun people for three hours today
-a slow week for work
-leftover fruit salad
-flowers from a friend
-sweet time with Jesus the last few days
-lunch with my brother tomorrow, playing with Malia tomorrow, and going to see Carrie and Loren on Saturday! wowee!!!!
-hope in my heart
-rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, etc....
-my cacti growing very well

and I feel like I could list a million more things. I am grateful for a happy heart today.

hoy

i am thankful for:

julia's mom
my 12 preschoolers and the way they have snuck into my heart
getting to share my heart with people who are safe
my new comforter
vegetables
free strawberries everywhere i went today
a 20 minute nap
bed time...right now :)

and today...

... i am thankful for:

mojo's

punch cards for free coffee

a clean car

sleeping in

good music

a day off

spring

the excitement i have in my heart about new staff training

i actually thought today "i can't wait to start support raising!"

talking to alicia last night and emily today

hummus

I just made some really great hummus.

Life has been hard lately. Which happens to everyone. But I am not believing things that are true and I am not running to Jesus to heal me, instead I am making really good hummus and eating a lot of it. So, following in the footsteps of Emily Bastine, I am going to resort to thankfulness instead of trying to come up with something interesting to write on here.

So, today I am thankful for:

hummus
lots of fun happies from my friend erin
sleeping in
good movies on tv
my job at target and my friends i work with